remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize