I am puke
im drinking this country out of the recession.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
When I'm drunk i like to pretend my penis is zeus and instead of peeing i'm throwing lightning bolts into the toilet...it helps me focus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
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