That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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