Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
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