It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
I miss my brother. He would have fucked the fat girl for me.
I told you I would
I wouldnt do that to you. You're my actual friend
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize