my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
