yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Randomize