it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
Randomize
