Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
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