Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
where are you?
Hypothermia
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize