We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize