How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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