How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
