I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Randomize
