she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
The trash can in my living room is full of Popsicle sticks and my vibrator has taken up permanent residence on my coffee table. I'm not doing anything productive. Clearly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize