now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
4 random people called me telling me they found him sleeping in the fetal postion on a driveway 45 minutes after we lost him
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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