Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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