last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
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I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
You randomly sent me a black Santa Claus emoji at 2am. I think alcohol was involved.
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I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
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