Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize