I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
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