If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
i'm pretty sure you can't sue someone for "Taking a shit on my kitchen floor."
Randomize
