There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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