i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
We're gonna have the chick that teaches kindergarteners to fold origami roll the joints.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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