Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
