I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
my god I love twenty year old dicks
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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