guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
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