So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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