I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
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You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
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is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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