im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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