You really coming over, don't trick.
Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
