Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Welp, I'm allergic to codeine. Found that one out the hard way.
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
