What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
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