you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
