Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
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