How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Death by dick. An honorable death. Put a picture of his dick in the photo collage at my funeral.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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