i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
These tits shall not be calmed
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
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