Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
