Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
Randomize
