Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Drunk sperm are not productive sperm.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
