Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
He was eating me out on a samsung washing machine and as soon as I came, I heard the "end of cycle" song. That tune will now always remind me of the screaming, multiple orgasms I recieved tonight!
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
