i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
