it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize
