Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
