I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I just gave her a sobriety test in the middle of the baking aisle.
And the results, officer?
She's fucked.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
Randomize
