I just woke up to my FedEx of contacts I've been waiting for for about a week and my hungover ass went to the bathroom and used beer instead of contact solution.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
Randomize
