Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
I love how understanding people are when they hear we first hooked up getting high and watching nature shows
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We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
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Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
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