he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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