I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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