i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
I'm watching Cheaper By The Dozen. I almost forgot that Hilary Duff was a really shitty actor before she was a really shitty singer.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Randomize
