Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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