How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
