is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
So how'd the job interview go?
well turns out the guy interviewing me was a regular at the strip club where i used to work. Talk about awkward
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Randomize
